I have to say, I’ve hated every job I ever had. Even the ones that I liked.
Over the years I’ve accumulated a somewhat eclectic resume including such jobs as an animal caretaker, typist, farmer, and usher. Some of my jobs just sucked. Bad pay, annoying work, rude coworkers, bad boss, some of my past jobs have had absolutely nothing redeeming about them whatsoever. But I’ve had a few that were pretty good, objectively speaking. My last job was working for people that liked me, with people who respected me, doing something I was pretty good at.
Most days I still hoped for some accident that would lay me up for a couple of months just so I wouldn’t have to be at work.
It wasn’t that I’m lazy… I mean, I am lazy, but that wasn’t what this was about. I’ve known for most of my life that I wanted to be a writer, so every job I’ve had that wasn’t directly related to that felt like a waste of time.
But one thing I will say about all those jobs, they kept me on a schedule.
It’s 8:50 in the morning, and I haven’t gone to bed yet. When I don’t have something specific forcing me to keep to a normal sleep schedule, my mornings and evenings just kind of… slide. They slip a few minutes here, a half an hour there. Suddenly I find myself waking up in the middle of the afternoon and working on my writing until the sun comes up.
Now, give me a couple years and I (hopefully) won’t be complaining about that. Working at night is fantastic. Something about being up when everyone else is out just makes you feel… creative as hell.
But I’m not to the point that I can do that yet. I may not have a job, but I still have responsibilities, I have phones to answer, I have things to do. I take care of some odd jobs for friends and family, and they don’t much care for me trying to take care of that in the middle of the night.
So now I’ve got to choose, I can try to force myself to go to sleep earlier and earlier, or try to stay awake later and later. You’d think that schedules would slide back into place as easily as they slide out of it. You’d be wrong. Sleep is a fickle mistress, and there’s nothing she likes more than to tease you to death.
Alright, I’m going to stay up one more hour, just one more.
If I had any caffeine in the house it wouldn’t be nearly so hard to pull off, but I just ran out and I don’t want to drive to the store when I’m this tired.